FIVE DIMENSION PLACE BY THE JOHNS

The Johns is a perplexing band for following two reasons, neither of which is the fact that they’re called The Johns, and none of them are named John:

(1) Their aesthetic screams surfer and sk8r boi (shoutout Avril) frat party (if those are a thing), but their sound is airy instrumentals with more reverb than Thom Yorke himself could ever hope for, throwing in the occasional crunchy guitar for tonal shift and dramatic effect.

And now that I have typed those two things out, I realize that they are more similar than I initially thought. The only difference is that it’s the surfer/skater vibe on the other end of the spectrum. It’s the chill surfer vibe that leaves you wondering whether or not they’re ever truly present or if they’re surfing off into the night sky and across the galaxy like they’re in a Fantastic Four sequel, but instead of searching for and preparing a planet for Galactus’s destruction and eventual consumption, he just wants to know if you have anymore Flamin’ Hot Cheetos.

(2) This EP is drastically different from their first full-length album, Taxi to San Fran, which was released just two months prior. Let me be clear, this isn’t a bad thing, but while their album has a solid surfer rock sound throughout, there’s a certain quality about the EP, especially the guitars on the title track and the second track’s vocals (and even its title, “World Infected”), that reminds me of the post-grunge/hard alternative rock bands of the 90s to early 00s like Bush, Puddle Of Mudd, Breaking Benjamin, Three Days Grace, and Linkin Park at their post-grungiest. In short, anything that might show up in Mission: Impossible 2. Everything else though? Nothing like post-grunge or hard alternative rock, which is good because I think I am still recovering from that phase in my life (middle school). But it’s still quite different than their album.

​The most interesting track title is by far “October Sky’s.” I’m not sure what is being possessed by the Jake Gyllenhaal classic movie. October Sky’s phenomenal acting? October Sky’s heartfelt message about following your dreams and the eventual acceptance of a father for a kid who he has nothing in common with, leaving an 8-year-old me crying as I watched it multiple times on VHS? Who knows! I definitely don’t. Did I listen to the lyrics close enough to try to find out before writing this review? Of course not! I’m just kidding. I did, but I am honestly still not sure. Maybe they can let me know sometime.